origin 12 notes in origin index ellie epp

as a person wd say it




images of field and field or field and pasture meeting


imagination likes what refers to itself


local writing and pictures. glamours. the screen


the first summer. the question is, is there still an outside

the slides show: a staring school alone in the land.

a staring truck to the eyes in grass. a view from further

back than the door. a view from behind a shadow flying.

doubled flame rearing to look. a photographer veiled.

a bone and its shadow in ashed ground and water



is part of - the one becomes two, within one, / which is

one within one

the mirror reflection is again placenta


I feel a homecoming light


after birth, seeing the placenta. gnarled, heavily veined.

meaty. red and blue


hold up the placenta so the child can see



how as it goes into a new part it has also immediately a

circumstance, / knowledge which is its own

the dimension it doesn't have is knowledge of its

whole sequence




first part bleached green a ghost is visiting the



the kindled image feels the smallest flare


a liminal beating wheatfield


running little creeping color change


they slide through the exposures



over the east place grassland a flotilla of them, sailing

in that even way


acute farmland


it's already live and already bright. it registers

exquisitely the smallest breathing shift of your

thigh as fluctuation in brightness

if we were parting for life it wd be like this, blind

and already gone, wd it?

you're going through war to your family, we know

there'll be no turning around


laying cheek on bathtub edge. I don't want there to be

anyone else in me. I want to be alone in this work




something else - a moment of the other - next to a

moment of this one -

when he was stubbornly for a long time standing in the water

towing the lily on its long stem


without shame, with shame, in the model, in the one


expresses a time, there can't we corrections


she said that writing is the cube, that fissures and still

stands together




what's the other - one who has begun - I have -

in this one different - and again the same


moon is the image of - and that no one saw it was -

shows the terminator where at this dusk we are

it's white, in color


from showing her reckoning of repetition in the larger and

smaller parts, the girl with the doll


reflected. does it look like that?


they were so long not knowing what the moon is -

'in the old days they must have known about that' -

was what? - was that she felt the gaze reflected in the



my womb is interested

'I can feel that'

my womb is listening




there's a projection of space and time behind and ahead,

it's like standing in a wide place. the other is like

standing in a river, everything comes toward you, it's as

meanings, it's like being in a dream awake, it's

reading it as if it's a dream, it's meanings, color, it's

connected to color; the other is space



writing follows the voice out or: it separates


every phrase contexts itself. that's not quite -


the movement from one meaning to another is a shift I feel spatially


I liked the image of working from inside rock to open

perspectives a prenate thoughtful touching of directions


there's no possibility of getting it all but if the few

traces are accurate the rest will be accurately implied


thinking by an emotional indication, placing something :


working within the hologram already formed





am I the anchor in this world and she out on the end of

the cord


I have to bear the not knowing you - 'I had to realize

I didn't know anything about where you were in it' -

the spots of the red berries of the rowan in the light that

had no other color


hand on the thin chest between the beginnings of the

breasts the small grieved dazed one smal grievd

dazd one


in the two days of shouting, the marvel of what can be

said. the marvel of how much is not understood




woke with bars of knowledge arriving a new joining of

parts that were already very near


already looking to see how it could be beyond the bridging

if I can take aside everything enthralled in that way


years looking to know what is glamour what is

gender what is dream and image what is alternative

to these

what is geometry in relation to these



upstream in an unaccountably sealed-off fresh source

there's a sensation, but thin. of having made the

crossing. thin like memory, and already past the pour of

spontaneous ordering


the alone i wanted was to have slipped my referents


what's there is not a figure but a few lines and a sense

of figure


then what was that delicate seeing, already I can't resee

it who is there when i'm not I am the shell

of it I want to see it


bonnard: to show all one sees on entering a room





backroom work, green notebook, look for local country

notes. what I find is descriptions of life before birth.

that's all I was collecting. that is, having left it,

the country I left, is that. it compiled structure



standing on the lane at the bottom of the translucent

sera standing on the lane with dry grass next to the

track standing far, away, under the moon. around the

moon is light as if on a surface the height of air

oh the crystal air amnion



when I see metaphor can I see the necessity of metaphor, can

I see what metaphor is


the body in water, which reads the tremour's shapes


sources by straight lines


from any tow points, establish


what's the relation of this coming through to the new

attention''the slide of luke newborn, that i'd never seen the pain of.


now I wanted just to pick him up and hold him




hello is it over am I alone am I not going to be a

person anymore



the many parts, the mass of parts, as angled lines, which

if I cd push through in that intensity, wd be aligned so

an outstanding knowledge wd be there, across kinds

the material seemed about to crystallize beyond me


I want to make, I saw I had, a submersion piece all the

ideas the slant of ..


the not-knowing in that molecule broth - broth - what's

the relation to the sense of power not -struggling but

-usedness: power-matching. the sense of both watching

vulnerably to get a magic working of the broth, and

suspecting it is simply, or 'also' a vulnerability to

the feeding needs of everyone i'm in bond with. not knowing

how to tell. the two might be the same. so deep in

speculation, feeling it a crazedness maybe

is this what artists do, is it what performance is





well, we very quickly found ... the particular thing for

instance that a cell is a detector of a feature in the

outside world ... it just was more complicated than that;

a particular cell's output is determined by a whole set

of variables, so that if we change for instance a color

in the input to a cell, through the visual system of course,

we might find -- a particular cell sensitive to green --

that same cell might be sensitive to the orientation

of lines at an angle. another variable might be the

intensity or luminance of that line; or how many lines;

or what the spacing between the lines is


things being what they are

things resembling




three weeks. the light steady wave on the stone.

I miss you (i'm here) are you really (gather

it) but I will (yes you must)