ellie epp




charm,   value,   ethic     tactic     and gender,     in writing

what is always transmitted is the quality of a mind
precisely transmitted is the quality of the moment writing
revision mixes times         revised writing is writing by more than one person
reading scans through to the rules someone is writing by
the writing isn't done in language,   it's done in something like gesture,   from a hovering behind,   like 'noting'
what's noticed is experience   (political, erotic, sensory),   nerve,   acuity,   solitude
the rules I write by, those i'm in reference to now, those i remember struggling in, undiscussed:     familiar unspoken suspension in a space of charges
rules keep up with ability so they're next to impossible
that is tactical but not felt as tactical;   it is felt as ethical/technical absolute other writers are judged by
certain other peoples' work is there alongside like a terminal whose other pole is what i have to write,     my own time
unending tension in relation to home language and school language
wanting everything to be what it is
anger to be anger given to the person       desire to be desire given,       seduction to be successful
memory to be precisely memory,     fantasy to be precisely fantasy
the intuition in fantasy to be known for what it is
writing to be whatever it can be when it is no longer a displacement
'built by the extremely delicate decisions of conscience'
the whole of the writer
'writing inside the hologram already formed'
'an embodiment of values & responsiveness'
structuring concerns having to do with the history of a genre are a death
any phrase contexts itself
a phrase has a world implied
if writing grips there is something real in it, but look carefully
the pleasure in attractive writing is information like the information in sexual attraction       it signals that something there is worth perpetuating;     but it can be perpetuated without ever being recognized
it is better for a meaning to be read than to be passed on unread as a striking or 'beautiful' thing
what attracts in writing is often an unconscious recognition, unrecognized homology,     underreference
to:     body parts or function,     sexuality,     the life span,   undiscovered physical law,     unarticulated experience structures         (these may amount to the same thing)
imagination likes what refers to itself
the sexuality writing works includes     powerfully:     birth and the long consciousness before birth,   which was previous to language and now,   stranded behind language,   tries to make its way through into the sort of memory that is made in language
the personal body,     the interpersonal network,     the locale, maybe the larger bodies,     whole earth,     universe and further,     seem to transmit in the writing of some who experience themselves as persons,     writing as persons
writers can write what they themselves don't know or misread
i want to know what is being said through me     and by whom,     for whose use
i also want the elation of writing beyond myself
the glamours possible in writing are used politically   as seduction:     to slip   (unconsciously)   the image of the self   (unconsciously received)     into the other        to install one's own time in the other
the image and knowledge of oneself installed in the other is a transmitter,   receiver       vitality and information can pass through       i.e. it can be used vampiristically         or perhaps benevolently
those who are connected 'psychically'       whether or not they know each other       seem to work for or with each other and to have information about each other's work and state
the information may be oddly coded and is often misunderstood
there always has to be more precision in writing than I know the reason for,         because another range of consciousness can see what i can't now see
there's no possibility of getting it all, but if the few traces are accurate the rest will be accurately implied
the relation of hand and voice,     voice and undervoice,     when these separate:       i know hardly anything about this     except that there is a dialogue in writing where it happens,